Monday, December 31, 2012

The One With All the Resolutions

So, obviously, I have not done a stellar job at keeping this space up to date. I offer no more excuses, because who wants to hear that crap? You are just going to have to take my word for it that things have been pretty good since we last checked in here. Thanksgiving, my birthday, Christmas, now New Years, soon Sody's birthday...too much. Always too much at the end of the year, in the best possible ways. I love fall and winter, I love having holidays to plan for and decorating and making crafty things, I love that Sody gets it all now and shares it all with us completely. Even when we make a homemade gingerbread house together and the whole thing falls apart in front of our eyes. I even love that.

And right now it is New Year's Eve. Sody and Joe are watching Duck Tales, I am cooking a big pot of black eyed peas on the stove for good luck. (Good luck would be having someone else besides me help me eat the damn pot of beans, but alas, that ain't gonna happen in this house.) I used to hate making resolutions at the end of the year and found it incredibly pointless...but now I kind of like the idea of taking stock. Nothing wrong with assessing and seeing where you wanna go from here. So, without futher ado:


1. The obvious first: be better about keeping the blog more up to date. This is going to be easier now that my fabulous husband got me a new and desperately needed laptop. Bigger better faster and fancier, and I haven't even scratched the surface of what it can do. But in the meantime - I don't have any more excuses. I have the means and with Sody I have plenty of material. I think I get caught up in feeling like it's too time consuming -  like I either need to post the latest picture of her (and I don't take as many pictures of her anymore) or I need to say something Big and Meaningful in each post. I need to get away from that and just write whatever happens to come to mind. Sody does at least one hilarious/bizarre thing a day, I just need to tell you about it. Document before I forget it. Like the time last week when Joe's minor road rage caused him to call another driver a choice name, and then Sody piped up from the backseat, "I'm NOT an asshole!" You want to hear that stuff, right?

2. Consume less: drink, food, junk for the house that we don't need, junky TV my head doesn't need.

3. Don't let Sody watch so much TV. We have gotten waaaaaaaay too lax.

4. Write more.

5. Talk less.

6. Work on another baby?  This is a maybe. I am scared to pull the trigger. Not really having the money or the space for another baby will do that to you. But, god, how awesome of a big sister would Sody be? I could cry right now thinking of it.

7. Don't take my husband for granted. I think I do this sometimes and I need to not.

8. Find a hippie, all-natural deodorant that actually works. I'm sure I am starting to alienate people at the office.

9. Find a new job, or at least be on my way to working towards something new. Something meaningful. Something career-like. I have been spinning my wheels for way too long and getting nowhere and it needs to end here. My job takes me away from my kid for way too much of the week - I need that time to matter.

10. Finally start that Etsy site I have been meaning to start for, I dunno, the last three or four years? How long has Etsy existed? Doing this means I would have to actually craft enough of something to sell it, whereas I seem to have crafting ADD:  I try one thing, love it, get bored, and quickly move to the next project. I need to find my medium and stick to it.

11. Dole out a little more structured discipline for the little one. Stick with time-outs if she deserves one, follow through on consequences, etc. Turns out I am kind of a softy parent. I don't want a spoiled brat because of that.

12. Be a little easier on myself about dinnertime. I am either guilty that we aren't having proper family dinners at the dining room table, or that we aren't all eating the same meal, or that dinner isn't a lovingly prepared hot homemade meal every night. I want to let go of that guilt and realize that nope, it isn't perfect now, and it doesn't need to be. She's little, Joe and I both work full time, this is our crazy life right now. Dinner is going to be boxed (organic!) mac n cheese and frozen veggies more often than not. Big deal.

13. On that same note: spend less on groceries. I really need to work on that. I fall into the trap of finding so so so many recipes I want to try and then end up with so so so many half full jars of specialty ingredients sitting in the fridge. And a husband and kid who would be much happier if I had made the $1.99 boxed mac n cheese. Sigh.

14. Less coffee, more tea.

15. Be more present with Sody, even with every endless game of Candyland I don't really want to play. My time with her is so limited in general that I need to truly BE there when I am with her. Like every other stage of her life, this time is so fleeting and soon I am going to be wistful for the times when she wanted nothing more than to play a game with me. I need to be less distracted, think less about the next moment. Be in the present moment.

16. Stop overthinking things. (This is just a general life rule that I will probably never break out of, but still a good reminder right now.)

Ok, I gotta stop because I could boss myself around forever...